Bearding the Issue

Beard is a slang term, American in origin, describing a person used, knowingly or unknowingly, as a date, romantic partner (boyfriend or girlfriend), or spouse, either to conceal infidelity or conceal one’s sexual orientation.

And there’s me thinking it was something that my agent asked me to grow for something that starts filming next January. It’s the sequel to a project I filmed 10 years ago. In that instance, I had false facial hair, brown and lengthy. Today I’m sporting ten days’ growth, which is alarmingly white and short. Currently, I look like someone who didn’t even get a recall for the recast of Captain Bird's-Eye. Perhaps I could be one of the group of animated vagrants who assist Vincent Price in his murderous exploits in the film “Theatre of Blood”. It won’t be long before it’s second glances on the tube and I can stop using deodorant.

Since the events of this series take place only eighteen months to two years after the events of the series, we filmed ten years ago, a snow-white beard may cause continuity problems. I’m hoping beyond hope that when the excellent makeup team is given sight of it, they decide to go with spirit gum and something from the floor of a barber’s shop in the Philippines.

It’s just so hard to get the Crème de la Mer in between the stubble. A real Third World problem, I know, but as I’m sure the secret of my success lies in a good moisturiser, it’s one that worries me.

It is the only beard I’ve had difficulties with. I’ve not had calls for a beard of American origin. The good ship Scout now has a splendid first mate. He lights up the boat and my life in equal measure, and I’m thrilled to have him around.

Nights on the sofa, curled up on in front of “Married at First Sight, UK” are a joy and the winter days seem brighter as a result.

It’s corporate season work wise and having just directed a conference in sunny Lisbon, I’m currently commuting between Warsaw, Munich, Copenhagen, and Rome until December.

Then it’ll be nice to put my acting head back on, hopefully unbearded for a few months of filming to begin 2024.

I’m just hoping I start the new year without the facial hair needed to have spent my Christmas in a red suit with a big sack.

Brayden and I with good friends Jenny and Ella at the UncannyPodLive.