Putting it in perspective

For most of us who act, the job is our life. It's what we live for and we count ourselves lucky that we live to work. Many have been the days earlier in my career when there's been nothing to keep me occupied, least of all acting, and I am always grateful when there is something in the diary. The prospect of retirement, while looking attractive on a damp day, is not one that I would really relish. My partner is well aware of this and has no plans to let me retire gracefully. He fully intends to keep sending me out to earn my keep, probably until I drop, or certainly until I'm old enough to play Firs in The Cherry Orchard,

A summer of writing, and then an enormously busy September and October directing two major conferences, and doing quite a few individual training sessions, have also had to fit in a major house move. After nine years in sunny Sydenham, we've moved to Shortlands, between Beckenham and Bromley. The flat is absolutely delightful, and from the moment we took possession on completion date two weeks ago it has felt like home. Last weekend,  ably assisted by a first-class team from Pickfords the removal men, we moved in. Much less traumatic than I'd expected, although there was one moment for each of us during the weekend when it felt like we'd never get on top of things. The good thing was that by Sunday night, no matter what state we were in, we had to just face getting back to work things on Monday morning. For me that consisted of what these days has almost become a rarity, a theatre audition.

Given that my head was still full of moving arrangements, and the spare room was still full of 30 boxes, the forthcoming audition had occupied little time in my thoughts. So often when an audition looms out of a period of quietude on the work front, it can assume mammoth proportions of importance. Often this can be the reason that one doesn't get the job. They say that you get work when you're in work, and that's probably quite true. The audition seems much less important when you have a job to go to. 

Having read,  and given what I thought was a fair stab at the role, I was back out onto the pavement and in search of some picture hanging clips, some cable ties, and a four way plug. The audition faded back into the mist. I haven't heard anything yet, but I certainly haven't wasted any time worrying over it as I was away for two  days directing a conference, and the rest of the time has been spent attacking those boxes in the spare room. 

By Friday morning I had found the power cable to my iMac, hence I'm now able to blog once more, and by 5 PM today, Sunday, I have the semblance of an office. I can't get the second monitor to work. I can't find the power adapter for the external hard drive, and I can't find any paper to print anything, but other than that I'm doing fine.

And of course I haven't really thought about that audition. I haven't spent the weekend wondering if it's a yes or no. It will be what it will be and it's probably already been decided. I know it's hard sometimes when that one audition is the only chance you have, but in order to build your own resilience, you really do have to step away from the audition when you step out of the room. Give yourself some feedback. What did you do well? What might you have done differently? Then leave it alone. Get on with your life and the next opportunity.